Monthiversary...

Happy Monthiversary to me!

It's my One Monthiversary!! The perfect time to look back and see all the way the Lord has led me, thus far...

One month and two days ago, I had an 18 hour migraine. I woke up with it, worked through it, and went to bed with it. I cried twice at my desk. I was depressed, overly emotional (even for me) and had Popeye's for dinner because it was what seemed most comforting at that moment.

This was not an atypical day for me. I had days like this at least once a week, if not more. My weeks were also typically peppered with at least one migraine I couldn't muscle through and one or two others that were not as long-lasting. Eating what seemed most comforting in the moment was a daily thing and my selections generally rotated between Popeye's, McDonald's, pizza, or nachos. The depression had been creeping up on me for a while and often led to entire days spent on the sofa or in bed. It also led to me sighing...a lot.

On a typical weekday, my food diary might look something like this:

Breakfast: coffee with heavy whipping cream, 1 piece of country sausage, 2 packets of instant grits (I'd leave out the grits if I was trying to be "good".)
Snack: 2 servings of cheez-its and a coke zero (or peanuts if I was trying to be "good")
Lunch: Healthy Choice frozen entree (on a good day) or a double Whopper with extra mayo (on a bad day) and a coke zero
Snack: Chips or nuts maybe with a little candy and a coke zero
Dinner: 4 slices of pizza or a 3 piece from Popeye's with a large red beans and a coke zero
Snack (because, even after all that, I was still craving food): chips and candy or ice cream from the corner store and another coke zero.

Fast-forward 32 days...
Now, my typical weekday food diary looks something like this:

Breakfast: coffee with a little organic half & half, greek yogurt with berries
Snack: a piece of fruit
Lunch: Leftovers from whatever I made for dinner the night before. Usually,  some combo of lean, organic meat and fresh veggies (unless it's Meatless Monday...which I invented, by the way...but more on that later.) and a coke zero (only if I go to my Mom's)
Snack: Carrots or peppers with hummus
Dinner: Some combo of meat and veg (my favorites these days are beef fajita or Mediterranean chicken lettuce wraps, shrimp stir-fry, and rotisserie chicken with sweet potato and broccoli)
Snack (only if I'm hungry): a piece of fruit

I've only had one migraine in the past month and that was on a day I made a bad choice for lunch. I've had 3 other headaches that were either sinus or food-related (from not eating on time or not eating enough). They didn't last very long and didn't impede my day at all.  I haven't had any Popeye's, have only eaten "off plan" once (the day I got the migraine...it was sushi, in case you were wondering), and haven't had one single craving for the junk I used to eat before. The depression has lifted and I've only cried at my desk once (it was a rough day). My sighing has also diminished.

Down 21 pounds?
Winning!

Oh, and did I mention, I've lost 21 lbs?


Twenty one...

TWO - ONE pounds in 30 days.

Yep...that happened!

The negative pounds are very exciting, even though no one but me can even really tell I've lost weight. I notice some difference in my clothes, but, it will probably take another -20 before the general public will start to say "Hey, have you lost weight?" And, that's ok. The big change, the one that really,  truly matters and the one that will help keep me going for the long haul is something that can't be measured on a scale or validated by buying jeans a size smaller. That something is the feeling of freedom.

Scripture says,

    For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. (Galatians 5:1 ESV)

 It seems like a simple, easy-to-follow instruction..."I've given you freedom. Be free." But, at least in my life, I find I choose slavery more often. I think I am being free by choosing what I feel, what I crave, what I tell myself I need, when all I'm really doing is turning the key in the lock of my cell. Then, I get so comfortable in there that I convince myself that it's normal, it's ok, it's justifiable, it's just how life goes, it doesn't matter.

But, it really does.

Being just on the outside of that cell door now, I can tell you, there is not one bit of self-indulgence, not one bite of anything, not one pity party, not one nap, not one choice I made in the name of comfort that was contrary to what my spirit and heart and mind knew was the "next right thing" that left me feeling like I do right now.

Not. One.

So, now that I've stepped into the freedom that's been mine all along, what's the next step? I mean, other than just to keep going for the next however long it takes me to get all this extra weight off. It's that thing that has always been the hardest for me. That thing I never think I have time for. That thing that requires a bit more effort than just shopping a different way.

That thing is...

 Exercise!

I'll be starting next week. :)

Hopefully...
t